I haven’t blogged much this year and I think that’s, in part, because I didn’t have a theme. I told myself I’d write about whatever took my fancy, but I never seemed to sit down and do it. Well, in terms of what I’ve been reflecting on, what I’ve been doing, the theme of my year seems to be “letting go.” Letting go of possessions that suddenly seem worse than clutter, that seem almost obscene in a world where so many have so little. Letting go of kids who are becoming more independent as they reach driving age and high school, respectively. Letting go of ideas of myself that are limiting or no longer true now that I’m past the half-century mark.
Letting Go Is a Journey
In some respect, letting go is freeing, exhilarating. In others, it’s scary. Like most things in life, it’s a process, a journey. I’m sure I’m still clinging to some things I ought to release, and I may be letting go of some things I ought to hang onto (friendships that seem to have stalled, cleaning habits, etc.), but I’m making progress. It’s making my husband somewhat nervous, especially when I start poking around in the basement—his lair—muttering about Goodwill and recycling. I have a sneaking suspicion that I’m focused on ridding the house of clutter because I’m not yet ready to do the hard work on my attitudes, habits and assumptions, but I’ll get there.
One In, One Out
My New Year’s resolution to not buy anything, to not add to the clutter, has been a good first step. I’ve stuck with it except for one T-shirt purchase at Target this past weekend. It’s a workout T, bright pink, designed to encourage me to get to the gym more often this spring. Believing that “one in, one out” is a good de-clutter practice, I ejected two tired shirts from my drawer to make room for it. Part of my urge to make do with less has to do with my changing understanding of my role as Christ’s disciple, and his direction to care for those less fortunate, but I’m not ready or prepared to articulate all I’m struggling with along those lines, so that will have to wait.
In the meantime, I hope you’ll tune in for most posts on what I’m calling “The Year of Letting Go.”